Louis steps into his sister's room, hunching his shoulders forward and feeling shame. But he pushes onward, closing the door and locking it for good measure.
It feels so odd to be in here, in someone else's space, dressed as he is. It's almost like he's publicly dressed only in stockings and gloves.
Could being in public like this work?
He has face masks. He's seen others parade around in special events, allowed to be as slutty as they wanted without any sort of intervention from the moral police.
He shakes himself out of it and steps through the carefully laid path around his sister's room. It's a place where she has everything in its place, and everything exists. From years of living here at this home, it has become a refuge and a prison.
On the far end of the hoard of treasures is her vanity, the one place where she can be pretty. The one place, perhaps, he can be cute.
The man lowers himself, ready to sit on the squishy seat, but stands up, his heart thumping. He can't just go bare-cheeked on there. No, that wouldn't do at all.
He pulls open one drawer and then another until he finds what he wants.
He holds up the pair of delicates up high. Underwear—women's underwear. His sister's. He gulps and lowers it down, spreading the elastic out, stepping daintily one foot and the other into it.
It's beyond the point of no return when he slips the pair on. He takes a moment to close his eyes and feel it out.
This is the sort of lewd behavior he'd always read about in his eroticas and the hentai magazines. He's seen this plot so many times before. Two siblings who look so much alike that no one notices that the one they're with is the male one until it's too late.
Too late.
It's not too late. He hastily undoes the garment and stumbles his way out of the room.
He's dizzy, sick, falling forward against the wall.
He pants heavily, his mind reeling from the thoughts and the unsettling of his stomach.
"W… what the hell… am I doing?" he asks.
"I can't do this… it's not right. It's so weird."
That's the logical, rational part of him speaking now. It's come back after all the horny, like a whip to his face.
Everything's moving way too fast. He throws the door open and stumbles over to his room, falling onto his bed. He grabs his phone and types hastily into the messenger.
Louis: I'm sorry. I'm feeling really sick right now. I can't do this.
With those words, he seals his fate. Even if he wanted to do this again. Even if he wanted to have an encounter with a stranger, it can't be with this one. He'll think he's a freak. He'll hate Louis for what he did, for teasing and manipulating him.
Louis rolls onto his back, staring at the ceiling, clutching his chest, his phone right up against his body.
That's when the phone buzzes in response.
He takes a moment, swallowing the lump in his throat, before he brings the screen again to see what damage has been done. Had the date called him a whore or a liar or something else that's terrible? Had he just blocked Louis entirely? Or worse, doxxed him to the entirety of the internet?
Oh fuck, what would his boss say? What would his family say?
Date: Sorry to hear that. Hope you feel better.
That's not entirely what he expected.
Date: I'm feeling kinda worried too. Actually, I think I may have gone a bit fast.
Louis blinks and sits up, sitting cross-legged, furrowing his brow. What's happening here?
There's only one way to find out.
Louis: Me too, actually. I'm super nervous. It's driving me crazy.
There's a pause. Oh, by the gods, the uncertainty! Why must it vex him so?
A buzz.
Date: Same, actually.
Date: Maybe we should just stick to our original day and time, but go someplace neutral. Coffee?
Date: Honestly…
Date: I just wanted to impress someone as confident and sexy as you are.
Date: But like…
Date: I think I might be demisexual?
Louis: What's that?
Date: It means I need to know someone before I can be attracted to them… or rather do anything with them. I dunno. I'm still figuring things out. Made some dumb mistakes.
Louis smiles softly.
Louis: This doesn't have to be one of those mistakes.
Date: Yeah.
Date: That's why I want to know for sure first.
Date: We could go somewhere out-of-town so no one can see if you wish.
Louis flops back onto the bed, sighing, feeling the weight rise off of him.
Louis: You know what? Why don't we go somewhere nearby?
Louis: iI you want, we could discuss something we both like.
Louis: I noticed the dice on the table behind your pic.
Date: Oh, those? Yeah, those are for a game I'm in.
Louis: Tell me all about it.
—
"Someone seems to be in a good mood today," Louis's mom says, bringing home takeout for the three of them. "Something happened?"
"Just a little… figuring things out," Louis says, taking his plastic bowl and utensils.
His sister sips her drink, narrowing her gaze at him.
Louis looks at her, his eyes like a deer in headlights.
He grips his bowl tight, takes a deep breath, and blurts, "I've been shaving and wearing long socks and gloves! I like how they feel, and I'm going on a date with a guy I met online!"
His sister choked, pounding her chest.
His mother pauses a moment and places a hand on his head.
"Oh, my baby, that's wonderful."
And for the time being, that was that.
All-in-all. It was a rather nice day of self-loving.